I Skipped Work Today

I Skipped Work Today
Posted on: July 11th, 2023

My Body Hurts

The last few days of work have kicked my ass. Throwing 60-pound cases of oil and detergent for 11 hours straight will do that to you. It doesn't help that we only get two 20-minute breaks during the shift. That's it. No lunch. Just the two breaks.

When I tell my friends and family back home that, I don't think they believe me. The usual response is, "That's illegal; they can't do that." Well, they absolutely can, thanks to those awesome "Right to Work" laws everyone was so eager to push through several years ago.

Hell in Arkansas, where I live, they are pushing through laws so that children are able to get back into the workforce.

I thought about opening up a sweatshop for 12-year-olds. But I'm not allowed around children. joking

I ain't skeered of work

I'll admit, I've been working since I was 12. I was picking watermelons and cantaloupes in the summer to buy school clothes. Did it make me a better person? No, I'm still an asshole. It did instill a strong work ethic, I do believe. But honestly, who cares? 

I've spent 30 years outperforming most of my co-workers. I could have easily moved up and been sitting behind a desk somewhere, but I just can't stomach the thought of working at the same place for decades just to have an easier job.

I have quit more jobs than I can shake a stick at just because I was offered a promotion. The mere thought of getting stuck at any place sends chills up my spine. Manual labor sucks, but sitting behind a desk is hell.

Back on Track

So anyway, I drove to work today and pulled into the parking lot. I usually like to get there about 20 minutes early, and I'll sit in my car and read the news on my phone until it's time to go in. 

Well, today, I pulled in and realized I had left my phone at home. I only live 5 minutes from work, so I thought, screw it, I'll go get it.

Once I got home, I stepped out of my car and the intense heat smacked me in the face. It just really made me not want to go into that sweltering warehouse. But I continued upstairs to my apartment to grab my phone and couldn't find it anywhere. I looked for 10 minutes and was about to have a panic attack that I had dropped the phone at the convenience store earlier.

So I woke up my girlfriend and asked her to call my phone. Luckily, I found it under the shorts that I was wearing when I got changed for work. Yeah, I'm an idiot.

My girlfriend was like, "Are you taking today off?" I was like, "No... I thought about it." Then the idea took hold. So I called in.

Afterward, I said, "There, I called, so what do you want to do?" She was like, "I don't know, we could take a nap or just lounge around the house." Then she went back to bed.

So I started working on my miles-long bug list for FartDump.

Bike Ride

Pickle Ball

Once the sun had almost gone down, the heat subsided, and it was really nice outside, so I decided to take a little bike ride. I had just drunk a Monster energy drink a few hours earlier when I was about to go to work. So I had a ton of energy. I was plowing through neighborhoods with the intensity of a maniac.

I finally got tired about the time I drove through Creekside Park. It's a new park complete with pickleball courts, a splash pad, a dog park, and Bentonville's first Cricket pitch. As I drove through the park, I noticed that there was a match going on at the cricket pitch. So I stopped for a breather to watch.

I can honestly say that was the longest I've ever watched cricket in my life. It actually looks pretty fun. 

Bentonville Cricket

After about 30 minutes, I headed home, but by then, it was dark, and my bike doesn't have a headlight. So it was quite a chore dodging people heading home from the park and traffic. I believe I'll take care of that problem soon. I am a night owl, and I think I would make good use of a headlight on these cool summer nights.

I keep forgetting that I can actually go outside in the evening here without getting overwhelmed by mosquitos. Back home, you better either be inside at dusk or spray three cans of repellant on you and still have to deal with the buzzing.

I can honestly say I haven't seen a mosquito in 2 years, and it's an awesome feeling after dealing with them for 40 years.

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